Calming the (in)famous Yorkshire Wallet

[mr B]

For the attention of those concerned ...

After doing some serious 'male' hacking, the contents of the said wallet could be in the region of £45,212 the firm of Sue Grabbit and Runn where unable to make any comment as was any involvement with the international banking groupe L.M.S. ( Lend Money Sensibly ) .

The case shall continue.


mr B

[mr B]

The matter will continue with the contents of other wallets connected to the case in question .


mr B

[strang steel]

Dear Mr Strang

Our client. the infamous Mrs BB. instructs us that she is prepared to show some interest in

a) the size of the buldge in your wallet;

b) the exotic confection to which you allude

and may be prepared to enter into negotiations.

Yours reasonably sincerely (rates upon request)

Sue Grabbit and Runn
Solicitors to the Gentry
Coach Parties Always Welcome

Sounds good to me, Mrs BB.

But my wallet bulgeth only because I refrain from excessive spending on certain confectionery which can be produced much more cheaply at home.

After all, Turkish Delight is mostly only sugar and rose water with a setting agent.

Therefore, may I draw your attention to this link

http://uktv.co.uk/food/recipe/aid/573989

Which I don't consider to be too taxing, so much so that I fancy even Mr BB could manage it?

[giner]

Sir,

Be advised that dispensing such culinary information as indicated in your post will likely have the perhaps unintended adverse effect of slamming shut any wallets that may, without predjudice, have had inclinations towards opening and purchasing the named confection through proper channels.

In such case, the now-famed Yorkshire Wallet may indeed be provoked into releasing its latent viciousness on anyone in its vicinity with ensuing legal action against itself being occasioned by an unfortunate plaintiff.

Dewey Screwem and Howe

[Mrs BB]

For the attention of those concerned ...

After doing some serious 'male' hacking, the contents of the said wallet could be in the region of £45,212 the firm of Sue Grabbit and Runn where unable to make any comment as was any involvement with the international banking groupe L.M.S. ( Lend Money Sensibly ) .

The case shall continue.


mr B

Sir

Our client instructs us in the following terms:

"the contents of the said wallet could be in the region of £45,212

HOW much?

I am open to reasonable offers and will meet you behind the Sir Nigel Gresley Memorial Coal Shed (Scunthorpe) on the night of the next full moon. Used fivers only, please.

I am easily recognisable as I have everything a virile young man could wish for: bulging muscles, a ginger moustache and a tattoo of Popeye on my right. I have my own teeth, which I carry with me at all times in a jar clearly marked 'Vampire Leeches - Do Not Disturb'."

Sir, we wish you well.

Sue Grabbit and Runn
Solicitors To The Gentry
Scrap Metal Bought And Sold
Disco Night Every Tuesday

[60800]

Sir Nigel Gresley Memorial Coal Shed (Scunthorpe)

I've never heard of that, and I live IN Scunthorpe.


The said Yorkshire Wallet is a tough customer to get a good deal from, whereas a Lincolnshire wallet, of which I am a custodian, hogs five and ten pences whilst willingly giving up ten and even twenty pound notes. I fear I will have to rake it to it's bare bones though to fork out the money needed later this month for my now completed TMC A4. The contents of this rather 'weedy' Lincolnshire wallet rarely averages more than £20

[52D]

Sir Nigel Gresley Memorial Coal Shed (Scunthorpe)

I've never heard of that, and I live IN Scunthorpe.


Its down Dawes lane.

[Mrs BB]

[
Its down Dawes lane.

First on the left after the All Nite Chinese Laundry: if you enter the Aaardvark and Eartrumpet Public House, you've gone too far (as indeed have I)

Mrs BB
Grouting Our Speciality

[60800]

Thanks, i'll have a look at it sometime


NEWS FLASH: The Lincolnshire wallet has crossed with a Yorkshire wallet. All they did was complain about spicy and smoked sausages........

[giner]

I'd stay away from that SNG coalshed. I'm reliably informed of some "virile young men" of that borough that have been seen with young ladies in compromising positions up against the back wall. Eeee! Them were t'days.

[Mrs BB]

Anyone know the time of the last bus from Sunny Scunnie?

Mrs BB
Never Knowingly Undersold

[60800]

Nope, I take the train. The only places you can get a bus to from Scunthorpe are Crowle and Barton. Oh Joy......

[60800]

Actually, I think it's 8:30 pm

[Mrs BB]

Ah, but the last time I caught the train there was the unfortunate incident with the polar bear, 37 huskies and a tin of Anchovy Surprise.

Mrs BB
An Area Of Outstanding Natural.

[60800]

Last time I caught the train from Scunthorpe it was one of those b####y pacers